Ontario, an apology is not an admission of liability: https://www.ontario.ca/laws/statute/09a03

So very Canada. Sorry!

As a Dutchie the way I used sorry is along the lines of “I am sorry, I won’t do that again.”

Then I had a long relationship with an ethnically Dutch person but culturally a Londoner (she grew up there) and also learned there is “I am sorry for your pain and wish I could take it away” (this implies though they probably would do it again because they are not sorry for their actions).

It was maddening at first but now I am used to it. I only do this in English though. In Dutch it’s almost like I physically can’t. It feels wrong to use it that way, almost unethical even.

But maybe that’s a me thing.

I’m a Brit. It was only after living overseas that I realised just how mad our use of “sorry” can be.

An example. One day I was on the tube. My bag was on the seat next to me. A bloke gets on, points at my bag and says “sorry”.

What he actually meant, was “move your bag”.

The thing is, if he had said something so direct, I would have said “sorry, what did you say to me?”

And on and on…

Isn't this just... normal? Maybe they use it more often, but (also in the Midwest as other comments mention) these uses are all more common than an actual apology.

But for a more distant example of the "I'm about to inconvenience you" usage being normal - isn't the Japanese "sumimasen" used almost exactly the same as these?

“Thank you” seems to be similarly versatile in London. You can’t go 30 minutes without hearing it. Once when I was in a bookshop and approached the counter with a couple books to buy, the shopkeeper opened with “thank you”. To this day I don’t understand what that was about.

Excuse me.

That's all it means. Excuse my impertinence, presence, gaul, mere existence; I need your attention. Many languages have this overloaded phrase and use it just as a Brit would "sorry". It's formal deference. It's polite.

And it's not like we don't also shout "Oi!" when we need to determine whether or not some brigand possesses a licence for whatever it is they're doing.

Oddly enough "sorry" is also quite common in the upper Midwest US. If I bump into someone else by accident, and it's my fault, they will reflexively say "sorry."

There was a whole sitcom called "Sorry!" starring Ronnie Corbett (famous from The Two Ronnies)

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0081937/

I'm reminded of The Hobbit with the phrase "Good morning" in the first chapter:

> "Good Morning!" said Bilbo, and he meant it. The sun was shining, and the grass was very green. But Gandalf looked at him from under long bushy eyebrows that stuck out further than the brim of his shady hat.

> "What do you mean?" he said. "Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?"

> "All of them at once," said Bilbo. "And a very fine morning for a pipe of tobacco out of doors, into the bargain.

The flaw with that article, it being the Beeb showing their bias, is that it mainly applies to the English Home Counties.

So it is a southern English habit, not a British one. The other parts of England are more direct, and will use more obvious phrasing. Similarly the other parts of Britain will be more direct.

Now I want to know if "Thank You" also carries as many meanings. I came here from Pakistan for work 6 years ago. Article is about sorry the Thank you was a bigger cultural shock perhaps. Number of Thanks I got in first few months already surpassed all thankses I ever heard in Pakistan. This does not mean we are thankless but you won't get a Thanks for moving aside a step on a footpath, or holding a door if you ever did.

I think it would illustrate more to expand the abbreviations. In almost all these uses, it’s just a short version of the “obvious” dictionary-definition apology. For example, point two’s “sorry?” is short for “I’m sorry I didn’t hear you, can you please repeat that?”. It puts the blame for the conversational stumble on the listener - whether or not that’s correct - to smooth it over. Point three is short for “I’m sorry to interrupt you or mildly inconvenience you, but could you do this small thing for me, a stranger that you have no obligation to?”. And so on.

This is exactly like in French and the other languages I speak.

I am not sure BE is a spacial case.

This is how it's used in Canada too

The British have a similarly strange relationship with the word "Brilliant".

This is like when I went to Paris for a business trip and learned that a specific set of French bourgeois take "bon appetit" before a meal to mean "have fun eating this shitty food" (and that you shouldn't say it in a classy restaurant someone picked to take you to).

I thought I was being pranked at first but then I learned that the exact same rule applies in certain "high establishments" in Geneva.

This is 100% accurate. I've seen someone apologizing for being stepped on (accidentally, of course). It really does mean "we have, unfortunately and inadvertently, crossed paths and must now ward off the evil spirits by acknowledging this".

I’m in the US and definitely have heard these in similar situations.

Another I don’t think was listed is a way to blunt an aggressive statement just in case there may be a misunderstanding.

“WTF did you just say to me?”

Might be “Sorry, but WTF did you just say to me?” would imply some anger that could lead to a fight but hey, sorry maybe I misheard you?

Which could funny enough lead to more sorries “oh, sorry I thought you said something else”.

'Sorry' serves the same purpose as 'excuse me', 'yeah' or 'okay' in that it has a multitude of meanings depending on tone, intonation and context.

For instance 'yeah' can mean 'yes, continue', agreement, skepticism, (sarcastic) disagreement, enthusiasm, etc.

The cultural difference is what word is most commonly used.

Meanwhile in America:

Can The Family Have a Good Time Playing Sorry? | The Carol Burnett Show Clip

https://youtu.be/_uBib8TatmA?t=397

You should also wink after ringing the little bell.

Mi dispiace.

  sorry that you're a cunt, now 

  1) get out of my way
  2) speak up
  3) get out of my fucking way
  4) stop being a cunt for a bit (and get out of my way)
  5) shut up
  6) fuck off

TBH I'm way less polite than I used to be. I literally never use "sorry" except "I want to apologize for something wrong I've done and it's a big deal". When I bump into someone I usually just move on without acknowledging the situation. But I also butt in with help without a word - there's a surprising number of children I saved by randomly approaching the parent and offering band-aids without uttering a word.

I think I kind of accepted that I don't have hardware acceleration for pleasantries and I only use them when there's something very clear I can gain from that, like at work. Otherwise I default to "Pass me the salt." like saying a command to a subordinate. "Can you pass me the salt?" is peak politeness for me.

BTW there's a fun story. Back at the university I had some shit course with another faculty, and one of exercises was spotting things on a recording. I mentioned a scene where women in a third-world country were receiving education and said "... because those chicks were getting educated" and one girl got upset "WHAT DID YOU SAY?!" while the other one got sad "nobody has ever called ME a chick!". Of course the interaction wasn't in English so that wasn't the exact word I used, but yeah.

how is this on hcker.news?? WoW!!

[flagged]

[dead]

[dead]