It's a valid frustation... sadly the social bits are often useful.

E.g. communication tends to work best if you have A: trust and B: a mental model for the other person. A is a buffer against friction. B is essentially API documentation about this specific person

The social bits are how most people build A and B

I develop A and B by working with people and paying close attention to them. I learn what they’re good at and what they’re not, how they like to communicate, how they like to work, what they don’t like to work on. I do this by paying attention during work. For me, the work is the social bit. I don’t need to play “escape from a room” with someone to do that.

Now, if other people do need corporate staged social games in order to build that up for themselves, then that’s ok for them, but why is that considered the norm? Why are they required? Why is it up to the neurodivergent person to exhaust themselves for them? Why is it considered normal for someone in a “People team” to ignore the needs of some of the people? I don’t see why other people’s needs are inherently more important than mine.

Yes, they're useful. But B: doesn't occur naturally for some of those with Autism. Sometimes names with faces is near impossible, at a baseline. Masking with those individuals, or feigning interest can be exhausting. Dancing around not wanting to discuss outside-of-work life can make one stand out, etc.

There's no polite way to tell such individuals to f- off, of course, and it's often expected.

sadly for who?