I am in my late 40's and I am struggling more than I ever have in my entire life. I have a great marriage and 3 children and I have a good job with good income. I have nothing to be unhappy about.

And yet my children are grown now and mostly gone. I feel a profound sense of loss.

I feel like I'm entering the age where I'm a prime candidate for any myriad of diseases and I get so anxious every time I get a symptom. I go to the Dr. a lot. I went to the ER twice every year in the past 3 years. Ironically, its occurred to me that if I do have something terminal, I don't have to go on like this. And I like the thought of that. I'm both terrified of death and also really looking forward to it.

I used to enjoy my work, but AI has made it so that I just kind of show up and ask it for things. Anyone could do what I do. There's no sense of accomplishment in anything.

The worst thing about this is that I have every reason to be the happiest person here. So the fact that I feel the way that I do actually makes me a pretty bad person and that makes the whole thing feel a whole lot worse.

If you are remote, I recommend taking all the time you save with AI and watching random highly-rated video essays on youtube. :-) It's sounds like I'm kidding, but continually learning and engaging with education and criticism has kept my brain working in ways that make me happy. Getting into a new art form (I've been buying a lot of manga recently) and learning about it is exciting.

Hey friend. I’m right there with you. Everything you said resonates with me.

I’m curious, are you fully remote?

Have you tried anything to shake things up?