I have a partially written blog post in my head, as I've spent a lot of time thinking about the problem. I'd have preferred if there was a change to the reader/writer interfaces, but even without it, I'm starting to see patterns that work and can be applied to any code to make it safe. People just need to be aware of the problem and that's my goal, although I'm probably failing if my tone is creating the drama, so I'm learning how to communicate it better.

I don't think you are creating any drama to be honest. I understand how frustrating it must be.

There is a similar issue in kotlin where a cancellation is marked via a CancellationException but that extends IllegalStateException and thus Exception. Because of that it gets caught and swallowed all the time. This is a constant source of bugs for me at work and google has resorted to a bunch of linting to get around this design mistake.