| ▲ | jsheard 10 hours ago |
| Building an attachment point into the tag itself is still beyond current technology though. We just don't know how to do it. |
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| ▲ | pftburger 10 hours ago | parent | next [-] |
| The fundamental issue preventing keyring aperture integration stems from the AirTag’s reliance on inverse-phase magnetic reluctance in the structural substrate.
You see, the enclosure maintains a precisely calibrated coefficient offramular expansion. Introducing a penetrative void would destabilize the sinusoidal depleneration required for proper UWB phase conjugation. The resulting spurving bearing misalignment could induce up to 40 millidarkness of signal attenuation.
Apple’s engineers attempted to compensate using prefabulated amulite in the magneto-reluctance housing, but this only exacerbated the side-fumbling in the hyperboloid waveform generators. Early prototypes with keyring holes exhibited catastrophic unilateral dingle-arm failure within mere minutes of deployment.
Until we develop lotus-o-delta-type bearings capable of withstanding the differential girdle spring modulation, I’m afraid keyring integration remains firmly in the realm of theoretical engineering—right up there with perpetual motion machines and TypeScript projects that compile without any // @ts-ignore comments.
The technology simply isn’t there yet. |
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| ▲ | nasretdinov 10 hours ago | parent | next [-] | | I must say you had me in the first couple sentences :). Also does look like it's not an LLM-generated text either. Good job! | | |
| ▲ | nerdsniper 10 hours ago | parent [-] | | Indeed, LLM's still suck at the cultural nuance required for humor. It's like they're writing for an audience that's too generic, so the joke doesn't truly "land" for anyone in particular. |
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| ▲ | kstrauser 10 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-] | | You really don’t want to accidentally frobnicate the turbo encabulator. | |
| ▲ | port11 6 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-] | | Of course the offramular expansion is what makes all the Fleeb Juice a key aspect of Find My. That and the lack of a substantive in the name. | |
| ▲ | 10 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-] | | [deleted] | |
| ▲ | next_xibalba 10 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-] | | > attempted to compensate using prefabulated amulite in the magneto-reluctance housing, but this only exacerbated the side-fumbling in the hyperboloid waveform generators Wrote my PhD dissertation on this. It would've been in the literature for Apple's engineers to find, but unfortunately I lost institutional support to get this into a journal after my college (Mailorderdegrees.com, an FTX University^TM) folded mid-process. | |
| ▲ | m463 7 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-] | | rumors are the airtag promax has it for $99. | | |
| ▲ | dmd 2 hours ago | parent [-] | | Sadly the polishing cloth doesn't work on that one |
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| ▲ | glitchc 9 hours ago | parent | prev [-] | | You missed the "strategic use of metamaterials to emanate a negative refractive index" |
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| ▲ | wmeredith 10 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-] |
| I think the point is to make the smallest unit of functionality possible and then people can integrate that into their use case using attachments, casings, etc. in a way they see fit. It's a good approach for this product in my opinion. |
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| ▲ | tavavex 3 hours ago | parent | next [-] | | I think this argument would work better if the AirTag in its minimal form wasn't so teardrop-shaped. It feels almost like it was designed to be difficult to integrate into other environments because it lacks any edges or openings. It ensures that anything that could hold it must be at least as big as the AirTag itself. It really confuses me why they couldn't even allow for a single small hole in its edge - it would still leave attachment up to the user, but make it far more flexible by letting people just hook it onto things. Is it because design had overpowered functionality in this product? Is it because this shape is somehow mandated by the hardware within it? It confuses me. | | |
| ▲ | istjohn an hour ago | parent [-] | | An Apple product in which design takes precedence over usability. Imagine that. |
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| ▲ | chrisfinazzo 4 hours ago | parent | prev [-] | | This might also explain why the first party luggage loop accessory seems to have been (unfortunately) memory-holed. I think third parties still sell them out of excess inventory, but they've been harder to come by in recent times. My current carry-on doesn't have large enough attachment points to easily accommodate the Apple leather case's keyring, so an updated loop would have been welcome. | | |
| ▲ | trillic 2 hours ago | parent [-] | | Mine is duct taped inside the inner liner of the carryon that has a small zipper for cleaning. |
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| ▲ | traceroute66 10 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-] |
| > Building an attachment point into the tag To be fair, most people I know put their AirTag inside something, e.g. inner pocket of a bag. At which point the necessity for an attachment point becomes somewhat moot. |
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| ▲ | fainpul 9 hours ago | parent [-] | | Same. I've never seen anyone put an AirTag on a keyring. Oh, wait... |
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| ▲ | ishtanbul 10 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-] |
| this is the smallest attachment loop i've found. It's rock solid
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09CPTS8JG?ref_=ppx_hzsearch_conn_... |
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| ▲ | 542458 10 hours ago | parent | prev [-] |
| Different people want different attachment types (or no attachment point at all), so it makes sense for that to be external. I've used other trackers with integrated attachment points, and because the attachment point has to be very compact it tends to be flimsy or hard to fit.. vs the Apple one where you can add a larger attachment point that makes sense to you. |
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| ▲ | peddling-brink 10 hours ago | parent | next [-] | | Are you trying to say that the AirTag is so strictly utilitarian, that they couldn’t have found a spot for a lanyard hole? I disagree, they could have, they didn’t want to. Beyond the look, this sure panders to their accessory partners. How big of an industry is the phone case? Should it even exist? The audacity. | | |
| ▲ | 10 hours ago | parent | next [-] | | [deleted] | |
| ▲ | myself248 10 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-] | | Right? Nokias had the equivalent of today's "case" built right into the design of the unit, plenty of durable plastic around the vulnerable parts -- the phone would've been considered unfit for sale if it couldn't survive a drop in out-of-the-box condition. By the time you stripped a dumbphone down to be as vulnerable as one of today's is, it'd be a bare PCB. Nah, probably even in that state, I bet it could handle a drop better than a new iPhone straight out of the box. What you buy today isn't a complete phone, it's just the guts. One tumble to pavement and you're out a grand. Heaven help you if you fumble it while trying to install the case that should've been part of it from the beginning. And yet, we still buy them, because the alternatives are from shady manufacturers who never provide updates, and there is no third-party hardware that can run up-to-date iOS. If there was, I'd buy an iNokia in a heartbeat. | |
| ▲ | wat10000 10 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-] | | Yes, the phone case industry should exist. People want different things. Plenty of people are willing to go without a case entirely. For those who want a case, they want different tradeoffs between bulk and protection. They want different textures. It's OK to sell something that isn't all things to all people. | |
| ▲ | wang_li 10 hours ago | parent | prev [-] | | Somebody take an x-ray so where know where to drill our own holes. | | |
| ▲ | dylan604 10 hours ago | parent [-] | | Already been done https://appleinsider.com/articles/21/05/02/x-rays-show-how-a... | | |
| ▲ | xattt 9 hours ago | parent [-] | | > For the initial disassembly, the AirTag is said to be the hardest to open to access the battery. Though all three could be opened by hand, the AirTag is suggested to be the hardest due to the lack of divots for grip. Does the author lack thumbs? It’s easy to twist the battery open. | | |
| ▲ | CamJN 8 hours ago | parent [-] | | The lack of a divot prevents iFixit from selling an overpriced single use tool that exactly matches the divot shape for $50 USD that just so happens to be the exact same shape and material as a $0.05 guitar pick. Totally unacceptable, won't anyone think of the environment?!?!?!?! |
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| ▲ | arghwhat 10 hours ago | parent | prev [-] | | There are third-party tags out there compatible with both Google and Apple's network that is roughly the same size and use the same battery, yet have a giant lanyard opening in the design to fit anything. Apple could trivially have fit a usable hole if they wanted to. They just don't want to because they get to sell accessories with that now. Also, looking cleaner on its own helps sell even if that is an entirely useless quality for a tag tha tneeds to go into a bloody case. |
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