This is one of the few hills I will die on. After working on a team that used Phabricator for a few years and going back to GitHub when I joined a new company, it really does make life so much nicer to just rebase -> squash -> commit a single PR to `main`

What was stopping you from squash -> merge -> push two new changesets to `main`? Isn't your objection actually to the specifics of the workflow that was mandated by your employer as opposed to anything inherent to merge itself?