The autism itself, depending on the person, is often less of a problem than societal expectations. For example- in a world where everyone was red/green colorblind, such a condition would not be considered a handicap. And in a world where everyone was autistic, many things would be different.

Society punishes us severely for not being able to see the difference between red and green, to use that metaphor. And they seem to expect that if they punished us just a little harder, we would suddenly become normal. Thats the big problem. Non conforming behavior is always treated as a crime or offense on some level, but we cannot conform, and therefore must adjust to a life of endless punishment doled out by both authorities and peers.

Its quite difficult to go through life that way without developing a negative self image. This goes for people with autism, adhd and other types of neurodivergence.

It's like being tortured to extract information that we do not have. They'll only believe it once they've completely broken you down.

And then you meet the next person, who has not yet tortured and broken you, so they again do not believe that you "don't have the intel", and you get to go through it all over again.

The worst part is when you start believing for yourself that they're right, that you're holding back, and that it's all your fault for not giving them what they want, just for the life of you you can't figure out how.

Getting certainty about my condition did so much to heal me.