| ▲ | ares623 a day ago |
| As a parent of two young boys, I am seriously confused in what values I should teach them. I am defaulting to traditionally "good" values because that's how I was raised and all I know. But there's a part of me that feels my kids will be at a disadvantage when they grow up, if they carry my values. |
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| ▲ | bawolff 18 hours ago | parent | next [-] |
| There have always been bad people in the world. Scammers were a thing 20 years ago. They were a thing thousands of years ago. One of the oldest documents we have is a complaint about someone peddling substandard copper. Morals that only survive in a perfect world are no morals at all. A value is only a value if you also do it when it is hard. |
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| ▲ | jareklupinski a day ago | parent | prev | next [-] |
| religion used to promise a heaven for those who did good, and hell for those who do evil life taught me that living well grants you admission to heaven here while you're alive, while committing things society still considers sin makes you live through hell right here on earth cant imagine how much better/worse it gets if theres more after death |
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| ▲ | ares623 a day ago | parent [-] | | nah even ignoring religion, there was this story of if you work hard study hard listen to your parents and your teachers and people of authority you will generally wind up more-or-less okay (not rich! just _okay_, and that's okay). | | |
| ▲ | jareklupinski a day ago | parent | next [-] | | its the ability to pass down stories which made us the ?best? species editing seems to be an emergent property :P | | |
| ▲ | skinfaxi 21 hours ago | parent [-] | | One very powerful quality of oral tradition is the malleability of the narrative which is lost when things are committed to the written word. | | |
| ▲ | cowlevel 6 hours ago | parent [-] | | The past was alterable. The past never had been altered. Oceania was at war with Eastasia. Oceania had always been at war with Eastasia. | | |
| ▲ | skinfaxi 2 hours ago | parent [-] | | Do you think we don't live in the world you describe? We are rewriting history constantly. You can always paper over artifacts with new ones. |
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| ▲ | SoftTalker 21 hours ago | parent | prev [-] | | This is still true. | | |
| ▲ | ares623 17 hours ago | parent [-] | | GenZ around the world would beg to differ. | | |
| ▲ | SoftTalker 4 hours ago | parent [-] | | Ask any employer, what value do they put on an employee who shows up on time, works while at work, and doesn't bring a lot of personal political agendas or psychological baggage with them. Do that, and you can always find a job. |
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| ▲ | eli_gottlieb 21 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-] |
| Why do you think your values conflict with teaching your kids to look out for themselves? |
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| ▲ | ares623 17 hours ago | parent [-] | | My fear is that "looking out for themselves" may no longer be enough, in the future world they grow up into. My oldest was born just before Covid. I was full of hope (perhaps naively). Things changed a lot in the years since then. And they still have a decade or so to go. |
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| ▲ | tayo42 a day ago | parent | prev | next [-] |
| It's not that confusing to be good to people by default,but look out for your self and not be a sucker? Unless you mean life skills to survive corporate culture. Then you just look out for your self,but give the impression you care lol. None of it's real relationships anyway |
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| ▲ | ares623 a day ago | parent [-] | | Oh that's the easy part. Those things, I can teach, am teaching, or will teach when the time comes. No, the hard part is teaching them on how to _actively_ do bad things. To actively seek out people that can be taken advantage, and to actively seek out ways to take advantage of said people. To be in that mindset all the time, so it becomes their nature. i.e. to be a hacker of people and society. | | |
| ▲ | rixed 18 hours ago | parent | next [-] | | Just to let you know you are not alone and I could feel exactly the same guilt when trying to teach my own kids into doing the right things; especially wrt selfishness. Solace will come soon, when you realise that the influence parents have over their children's education is in reality much less than what they think it is. | |
| ▲ | GeorgeWBasic 20 hours ago | parent | prev [-] | | If you're seriously considering teaching them that, you are not the good person you think you are. | | |
| ▲ | ares623 17 hours ago | parent [-] | | It's a dilemma. My belief is that part of a parent's job is to prepare them for the world they will eventually find themselves in as adults. If that world overwhelmingly rewards (or even requires, at a bare minimum) "hackers", then it would be a failure on my part if they don't have that skill. | | |
| ▲ | GeorgeWBasic 3 hours ago | parent [-] | | Absolutely it is not acceptable to train your children to prey on and exploit other people, for any reason. That makes you part of the problem, and it makes them part of the problem when they grow up too. The solution is to fix society (yes, I know how hard that is) or move somewhere sane, not victimize others. |
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| ▲ | gustavus a day ago | parent | prev | next [-] |
| "A virtue is something that is valuable even if it gives you nothing. A virtue persists without payment or compensation. Positive thinking is great. Vital. Useful. But it has to remain so even if it gets you nothing. Belief, truth, honor … if these exist only to get you something, you’ve missed the storming point." - Kaldin Stormblessed As a parent of two young boys I've had the same concerns, but I would rather have them grow up to be men of virtue in poverty that can go to bed at night with a clear conscience than the most powerful man in the world without integrity. |
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| ▲ | unpleasurable a day ago | parent [-] | | I take this to mean my negative-karma comments are at least virtuous | | |
| ▲ | bawolff 18 hours ago | parent [-] | | If they are made in good faith, and you believe what you say in your heart, they are. | | |
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| ▲ | MykhailoSailor a day ago | parent | prev [-] |
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