Most people who are saying this to you are in a similar situation like yourself, but with that missing element you have.

If you have money, but they don't, then they think there must be your fault, because if they had money, they wouldn't be in this situation.

If you're muscular, but they're not, then they think if they were muscular, they wouldn't be in this situation.

The biggest insult in the incel community is not someone who gets laid, but that someone is a volcel larping as an incel (purely as an attempt to demoralize them)

I do agree that the dating market is broken, but only men can find a way out of this. And those women want to be saved too, just not the way you think.