Go recheck your calculations, you'll notice something about their incentive in the case where you pay.

No, it doesn't. Because the value of a dating app is in its size. The bigger you are and the more options you can provide users, the better the experience is for everyone - paying and nonpaying customer alike. Given that most users of any dating app will be non-paid, making them miserable causes the largest portion of your users to leave, making the app a little worse and less competitive for everyone. Those paying and those not paying.

Further, customer psychology doesn't tend to reward paying to improve a bad experience. Users are more like to pay to upgrade an already good experience.

There is a very common idea that there is some conspiracy on dating apps to prevent coupling up as some strategy to reduce subscription churn, but it really just isn't true. The market is plenty large enough. Millions of relationships end every day. Millions of people turn 18 every day and enter the (online) dating world. The cold hard truth is that almost every complaint about the online dating experience is a complaint about human behavior, not about something remediable with better product design.

Source: I used to build and run dating apps.