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nl 4 hours ago

> women will only say yes to 9/10 or better men, but men will message anyone with a pulse which in turn inflates female expectations

Is this a SF thing?

I'm maybe a 7/10 and I've never had trouble getting dates in any city I've lived in or traveled through. I just put some effort into sound interesting, make sure my pics are the best I can find and it's fine.

But I've never tried dating in SF and I've heard the gender balance can make it harder?

twalla 4 hours ago | parent | next [-]

Women get an absolute deluge of interest - when I was dating it wasn't uncommon for me to see women with inboxes with 10k plus messages/likes. There's definitely an aspect of "just pick the hottest 2 or 3 people you're shown and close the app" because you're overwhelmed and over half of the profiles are poorly filled out/sending low effort or vulgar messages. I think most men do poorly because they don't understand the female gaze and they don't take the time to create a profile with half decent photos that communicates who would want to date them and why.

hn993302 3 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

It's SF and also age. I've been on both ends. But even when men have the advantage in serious dating, women on hookup apps get more attention because those aren't 1-1 pairings, if you know what I'm saying.

On Tinder and some other sites, it's unclear whether it's for hookups or dating. This led to some awkward dates for me back when I was single.