i find the inconsistent advice from "Dentists" very discouraging.

just like midwives they all seem to have their own opinions that dont equate to scientifically researched advice, yet are presented in a way that if you;re not paying attention will be taken as such.

It's also the case that different people have different mouths and habits and there is no one-size-fits-all solution, and the best option might be to try a variety of options and see what sticks for you.