> both side recognising that their goals cannot be achieved militarily without a very high cost

What are "both sides", exactly, and what are their respective goals?

To an outside observer, it would seem that the Iranian regime's goal is to stay in power, and that they are in a better position to do that now than before the bombing.

They have even unlocked a previously unheard of bonus, to put tariff on transports through Hormuz, which they never had the power to do before.

As an outsider it is hard to understand why this is happening and how it will end, unless all these concessions served to the Iranian regime were deemed worth it as distraction from domestic issues.