Uff, doing all of that plus developing your software sounds really hard!

I package software for void Linux... I don't think there's an expectation from devs to know all the intricacies and particulars of each distro and contribution guidelines in order to package software for it... A tar or GitHub repo and clear instructions is all we need to package it.

It becomes a pain when the software has hard dependencies on either bleeding edge unreleased software (I'm thinking hyprland) or very old versions of libs that are no longer shipped with the distro.

Another pain point is when the software makes assumptions about Linux like all linunx use glibc or have systemd. In cases like that packaging software might entail patching it, or just giving up (void doesn't use systemd for example)

Hope this gives you a bit of insight into what packages might be looking for