> This is treated as as a virtue, part of Odysseus reestablishing his rightful authority.

Treating it is a virtue is very much translation dependent aspect. Some translations treats them as guilty sluts, but not all.

It is a thing he does, but not necessary "virtuous" thing.

Also, Penelope is actively defending her faith to him. She did not had to, she could marry a suitor and save herself a trouble.

Historical arranged marriage are not romances, but people grow to have relationships to each other. People do care, just like we care about cousins, siblings or other unchoosen groups. It can grow to hate and abuse too, but those are not present in Odyssey.