a lot of monogamous people have multiple people they are seeing, having sex with

in the dating and hookup world this is seen as normal enough for disagreeing to be called insecure, in the long term relationship world it is also common, a timeless tale even, and in between all of that there are partners that say “if it happens, I just don’t want to know about it”

not monogamous, its just idealized for there not to be other partners ever and building relationships around policing each other’s sexuality forever

is there another part you would like me to elaborate on?