I kinda felt it was satire, but then the below quote threw me off:

> one vendor’s marketing team, cc’d on the cost anomaly alert, issues a press release citing “a 430% YoY increase in adversarial multi-agent security reasoning.” The stock opens up 6%.

That happens! That is not satire. So i had to visit the comments here to be sure :)

Satire does usually have a degree of truth/realism.

You could have "visited" the satire tag at the top of the article.