Calling something "simple" to use and learn is a valid use of the word, sorry. Not going to stop doing that.

> The cognitive load of _actually delivering software_ written in C is immensely greater than doing so with Swift, or Rust, or Python, or Java, even Zig, despite all of those leveraging much heavier machinery in order to deliver a friendlier abstract model for you to program against

Sorry, I couldn't disagree more.

I find the simplicity of C to be elegant. You know the rules; it's like the entire C language is the 1-page summary of the encyclopaedia of C++ or Swift or Java, or (insert more-modern language here). The key to working well in C is in defining modular code with well-understood interfaces. I've got 40 years of programming in C so far, and the nightmare stories ran out after the first few years. Programming discipline is a thing.

Similarly, ObjC is a far superior, much simpler, object-oriented language than C++, there's about 15 different things over C, and you know the language. Template metaprogramming. Phooey! You'll still have to learn object-orientated programming semantics, but it's a "simple" language.

BTW: If you think the brainfuck language example is in any way easier to understand than the C one, I think you might need medication. /j

> I've got 40 years of programming in C so far, and the nightmare stories ran out after the first few years.

You need to find something more interesting to do ;)