> I'm an atheist, but most of what I have heard from popes in recent years seems like sound and possibly needed advice.

This is a bad sign. I'm an atheist too, but I don't think religions should appeal to outsiders.

The idea is that by relaxing norms, he wants to gain more members. But it doesn't actually go that way. It alienates the core, and the people for whom compromises are made don't want to join anyway.

You can see this with the number of members for Unitarian churches (declining) vs Amish (growing).

It's the same with Gamergate. Games which chase inclusivity often fail, because the very people they appeal to don't actually want to play video games.

For better or worse, the Catholic church has shaped most of western philosophy for at least 1500 years, including topics not necessarily related to existence of a deity or belief in that existence. It's not surprising that some of their thoughts seem sound and consistent with your ethics.