I believe you are asking me in jest, but if you are genuine, this is what I would add to my CONTRIBUTING.md

``` # FIrst-time contributors

Due to the increased number of AI bots and low-effort contributions, we are being forced to add some friction for first-time contributors. PRs are closed for anyone not explicitly added to our list of authorized users.

To be accepted in the list, you must do one of the following:

- Show a history of meaningful contributions in projects from related technologies done before Jan 1st, 2023.

- Be vouched by one of the existing contributors in the core team

- (If you have github sponsors/polar/patreon) Be a sponsor for the project for the last 3 months)

- Submit a small payment, which will be held in escrow until your PR is accepted. The following methods are accepted (choose all that apply: paypal, SEPA, Crypto, Venmo, Pix, UPI, M-Pesa, etc) ```

Oh no, I'm being genuine. Documenting the process itself wasn't what I was curious about, I was wondering how you'd go about your last bullet. Accepting lots of currencies can be hard, but I guess I'm not super familiar with online escrow services. I'm not sure how simple they can make that process, or who would pay the cost of using them (I assume they're not free).

I was also wondering how automated or manual you would envision the review process. I'm guessing your hope would be that the small deposit would stem the flow of submissions enough to make it all possible to review manually again, and you would also manually return all the payments sent to escrow?