Humblebrag masquerading as self-reflection.

I think that's rather unkind.

From my perspective: it looks like a coming of age ... blinking into adulthood sort of voyage of discovery.

	▲	Esophagus4 4 hours ago \| parent [-]
		Nicely said.

▲

Paracompact 7 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-]

Eh, kinda. But there was enough self-deprecation there that it doesn't leave a bad taste in my mouth, and I consider this a genuine reflection.

> Why did I need validation from my org chart? > Pretty quickly realized I was being kind of a bitch. > I have a bad case of Why Not Me syndrome.

These cut deeper than faux modesty and are clearly insecurities. It's the rebelling of a sensible superego against an id hungry for validation, and the author doesn't downplay either of the two.

But yes, I'm sure he also gets a perverse thrill out of advertising his achievement, even if he intends to disparage it. It's a complicated psyche I'm rather familiar with.

	▲	holden_nelson 2 hours ago \| parent [-]
		Thanks for the charitable read. Yeah, it's not like the part of my personality I'm lamenting has just gone away ;) I did have a hard time writing this post because I'm not under the delusion that what I achieved is truly grand or worth posting on HN about. It was more meant to be a reflection on a mistake I made: setting a bad goal and then fixating on it. But yes, I feel a small tinge in my brain whenever I'm introduced as a "senior engineer". I'll know I've truly made it when that finally goes away.

▲

holden_nelson 2 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

Oh man. That means I'm _so_ obsessed with my new title that I've gone meta and found a sneaky, disingenuous way to brag about it on HN. Thanks for pointing that out. I must have a serious personality disorder. I should probably see a shrink

▲

iamwil 2 hours ago | parent | next [-]

You didn't need to say anything. Plenty of people would have stepped up to defend you. Now, the sarcasm looks defensive. This could be another blog post in a couple months.

	▲	holden_nelson an hour ago \| parent [-]
		Yeah, you're probably right. Sorry. Writing and sharing it is vulnerable, and it's always drove me crazy to see people treat those who choose to do that uncharitably. I try to check them when I can (on other people's posts). I should trust others in this context to do the same. I should probably develop a thicker skin if I'm going to blog on the internet in 2026.

▲

johnfn an hour ago | parent | prev [-]

Insecurity is behind comments like these. Don’t worry about them.