wth man I was told mh Model Y that I bought around 2021 was going to do all this but it's now too old or something?

Apparently some HW3 cars can get it. It's listed available for my 2022 Model 3 (Australia/Sydney). However the cost is twice what they charge for HW4, I believe.

It seems other HW3 might get a FSD-lite version. There's no official way to upgrade HW3-HW4.

I'm in the same boat, this is a whole thing right now. There is some kinda class action in Europe which will hopefully make them pay up or deliver something useful. I think a Refund plus interest plus a hefty fine for lying would be a good start.

It seems you got musked, overpromised and underdelivered.