In my mid 30s (I'm older now) I got breast cancer I drank so much, which was after I got pancreatitis because I'm too fucking stupid to learn my lesson. I am a biological male now one nipple shy of a set.

Oh and a DUI. Sleeping in a running car. I’m a jackass and an idiot.

I'm done drinking. Ideally my feet will be less numb and painful, my shoulder might stop hurting, the outer two fingers on my left hand might become un-numb, might even gain some weight.

My family is a bunch of alcoholics, "functional" if you believe in that sort of thing. I realized if nothing else, I need to break that cycle for my kids.

I'm so sorry to hear about your cancer diagnosis. I was (and am) terrified that I took ~20 years off my life up to this point, and it could be over any year now.

Alcoholism is no joke. I just wrote up a 17k letter to myself (with my spouse as the audience, not sure I'll ever show her, she hates me right now) about how I got to where I am. Reading it back and editing it has had me bawling for hours. I can't believe this thread popped up.

On the numbness - if you want it back, lift weights. Consistently. Like 2/3 of days consistently.

> the outer two fingers on my left hand might become un-numb

Care to share more how this happened?

could an ADHD test be opportune here?