This would be perfect if it could monitor the force with which the lid is closed (macs have accelerometers after all, either this info or an acceptable proxy could be derived?).

Gently close? no action.

Stronger, faster action? Disable touch ID

Slam shut in full panic? yeah disable all biometrics, lose all state, even wipe the ram and the filevault key if it's an option

Perfect rage quitting machine. There should be an enterprise version: when lid is closed with full force it also sends a professional resignation letter to the current employer.

You must not have cats or children if you think that last one is reasonable