Ironically one of the big tells for me is the "It's not this. It's that." Your comment uses a comma though so you're probably a real person :)

I assume they were aping those terms ironically (especially given the 'you're absolutely right')

Busted!!!!

Staccato (too may short sentences with periods) is also a telltale for me. Most humans prefer longer sentences with more varied punctuation; I, for example, am a sucker for run-on sentences.