You are correct, words are not violence.

Arming the Huthis, Hezbollah, Hamas, and various Iraqi militias _is_ violence. When an aggressor with a history of violence says that they are coming for you next, it is prudent to believe them. Iran has been chanting Death To America and Death To Israel for decades. They have been attacking Israel and are developing technology to attack the United States. It is the United States' responsibility to ensure that the attack will not come.

Claiming that Iran is not violent is a lie. Promoting the idea that the US should wait to be attacked first is a nice way to allow Iran to arm properly and ensure US interests are sufficiently harmed.

Most importantly, Iran has always complied with audits to its nuclear program. I would much more urgently worry about the only country in the middle east that lies about having nukes, refuses to get them audited and continually starts wars with anyone and everyone, and proclaims everything under the sun as "antisemitism" and then gins up military action against supposed "antisemites" whenever it can. Hundreds of illegal nukes in the hands of such a volatile entity are grounds for immense world wide existential concern.

Iran is violent...to its own people yes. If we want to play the proxy game then there is an unending list of proxies used by the USA all over the world to commit terrorism and war. Then by that the USA and Israel should be nuked multiple times over in proportion with the extreme level of proxy violence they commit. Since you haven't said this about the USA, then I will have no choice but to say you are lying about Iran and applying a different standard.