"Everyone says that they value directness, and from what I can tell the vast majority of people actually don't."

Well sure, of course we do. We (or at least, a lot of the readers of this who live in a US and similar economic and social system) have learned that it is virtuous and correct to say we value directness. But that's where it stops; it's just a thing that is right to say. Part of the current social interaction protocol. It's then widely understood that many interactions should not be hyper-direct.

What you have observed - people saying they value directness and then not exhibiting it - is the expected behaviour. This isn't a bug.