I agree. I would add a pet peeve of mine:

- Don't publish a code of conduct and then be an absolute asshole to contributors (pick a lane and stick to it)

I feel there is a lot of performative policy published, which at the end of the day is lip service. Actual users or contributors come along and follow the guidance, expectations, etc? They then find themselves treated like a hostile entity and there is a weird prevailing attitude here that's "fine".