> You don't "teach" your neighbors and you don't program them in a pavlovian way.

Sure you do. Punishment of bad behavior is a basic social rule. Words were exchanged. All they had to do was listen, understand and stop the bad behavior. Had they done that, things would not have escalated beyond a polite conversation. Unfortunately, people often choose overt disrespect instead. They choose to challenge the other guy to do something about it.

If anything they should be glad the punishment was as civilized as this. There are many places in this world where it could easily escalate to actual violence.

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tolerance 3 hours ago | parent | next [-]

> If anything they should be glad the punishment was as civilized as this. There are many places in this world where it could easily escalate to actual violence.

Agreed. But there’s a reason that guy apparently felt no worries about closing the door in OP’s face. Perhaps the likelihood of it escalating was slim. And there’s a reason why OP didn’t knock again.

In the resolution you propose in another comment, deviance doesn’t cease. It transfers to the guy who thinks he can correct people’s behavior with technology. But I need to remind myself where I’m saying this at.

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matheusmoreira 2 hours ago | parent [-]

> Perhaps the likelihood of it escalating was slim.

Not as slim as he had hoped.

People feel free to close the door on others because they are used to a life without violence. Their implicit thinking is "I'm not even gonna consider what this other person wants because what's he gonna do about it? Nothing." They think there is no way they will be held accountable for their actions. That's magical thinking.

People really shouldn't ask that question. There are a lot of things that can be done about virtually any situation. People would do well not to forget that.

"What are you going to do about it?" is a challenge. It's refusal to negotiate and a direct challenge to escalate the situation. "If this matters so much to you, then you had better do something about it". Not only does it escalate, it insults the other person. They have no choice but to escalate because the alternative is to be seen as weak which costs respect, especially if the exchange happens in front of peers.

> It transfers to the guy who thinks he can correct people’s behavior with technology.

Yes. The situation has escalated. The other person can either submit or escalate even further. Perhaps into physical violence.

Hope the hacker has a gun and is able and willing to use it. You know. Just in case. Plenty of people out there willing to die over real or perceived slights.

	▲	tolerance an hour ago \| parent [-]
		Who hurt you?

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Tade0 4 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

Humans are more complex than that. If they become aware that someone is applying such conditioning, they will defy it.

For the same reason corporal punishment doesn't work even on an average intelligence child. They quickly figure out that probability of getting punished again is not 100% and even if, that's just cost of doing business - sometimes it's worth it.

	▲	matheusmoreira 4 hours ago \| parent [-]
		It's not complex at all. It's just violence. People are doing things you don't want them to do, so you do something to make them stop. Pretty standard. If they can muster defiance, it's only because you weren't violent enough. If someone is defiant enough to play probability games with you, just punish them 100% of the time instead, even if they did nothing. He was probably doing it some other time where you didn't catch him, so it's warranted. There's always someone willing to escalate things further. Things will escalate until someone discovers their limits and backs down. Consequences range from being quietly hated, to being ostracized, to being actively fucked with, to being beaten up, to being straight up killed. Smart people don't fuck around and find out. They check their behavior so that they don't step on other people's toes for no reason. Violence very often comes with instructions on how to avoid it. Don't do this, and I won't do that. All they have to do is listen and follow the instructions. The outcome where the obnoxious neighbor learns his lesson and stops his bad behavior is the good ending. The behavior stops, the situation de-escalates and peace is restored. If they keep up their defiance, things will only keep escalating further. Somebody could get hurt.