Remix.run Logo
ninalanyon 8 hours ago

I think you'd have to be awfully closely associated with that household for that to work. As a widower I have to say that I really would not have wanted an outsider suddenly appearing and deciding what I needed help with when my wife died.

Perhaps it would work if there were very clear signs that the bereaved were unable to cope.

technothrasher 8 hours ago | parent [-]

You even have to be careful with bringing meals. When we lost a family member and all kinds of food started showing up, it was very sweet of people. But it became just one more hassle to deal with at a time when we already had too much to deal with.

antonymoose 5 hours ago | parent [-]

I feel as though you’ve skipped over the entire article, here you complain about people helping for an article titled “Let people help!”

AnimalMuppet 5 hours ago | parent [-]

But "help" has to be what will actually help, otherwise it's not actually help. That is, help has to be what the receiver considers help, not what the giver considers help.

"Let me help you in the way I want to help, not in the way you actually need" is either short-sightedness or selfishness. But it's not actually helpful.