> What happens if an octogenarian phones Geek Squad and says they're running Variant <X> of Linux?

Geek Squad: 'Sorry, we don't support that.'

Grandma: 'Well, what can you do to help me then?'

Geek Squad: 'We can set you up with a new computer. That'll be $Cost-of-new-computer plus $Cost-of-X-hours-of-setup.'

Grandma (possibility number 1): 'Alright, guess I don't have much choice, and you're the expert.'

Grandma (possibility number 2): 'No thanks. I'll use my phone instead.'