You mean

"As with anything in life it depends on a huge number of variables such as location, number of allies the other person has, the threat potential you represent, the number of allies you have, your standing on the social ladder, if you're in a position of power, your ability to understand social clues, the exact method how you ask, yada yada"

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ArnoVW 7 hours ago | parent [-]

No. It delends on how you ask.

Did you walk over? Did you say hi? Did you lower yourself to be around their height? Give them a second or two to get used to you? Tell them first that their noise is loud ? Ask them in a respectable tone if they would lower it, just a bit? Did you give the impression that you were asking, not demanding?

Of course I won't ask a drunk or aggressive looking person. But there is a wrong way to ask, and a better one.

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jraph 6 hours ago | parent | next [-]

I'm all for asking nicely in general but it doesn't work well with entitled people who don't give a shit about the people around them.

The chances, regardless how nice you try to ask, that the person who elected to broadcast their tiktoks or calls to the whole wagon at full volume goes "oh, sorry, I'm so embarrassed, I'll turn this off", are very low.

Last time I tried to ask "can you use headphones?", the guy answered "I don't have headphones" and put the volume even louder.

A person who cared even a tiny bit would not have started to begin with. Asking is almost futile. These people simply seem to be used to get away with inflicting themselves to people around without consequences. The worse part is that if you do nothing, you participate in this.

What can you do.

I think it can only work if it becomes very socially unbearable, or if they got fined for this. Or, indeed, if it brought them nuisance. In that regard, this HN post's solution is interesting (not sure it's good though).

	▲	pvtmert 5 hours ago \| parent [-]
		i agree with this one, in this particular order, how things be in large cities & crowded areas: - loud person does not care in the first place, that's why they do the loud act - usually they are more than 1 person, outnumbering me - although some places have public disturbance prohibited laws, unless there is a law enforcement/security around, chances of me being ending up in a hospital is higher than chances of stumbling on a decent person - it is easier to act or play stupid --- on a similar note, last time when i asked someone to lower their volume while having headphones on me, they demanded my headphones because they claimed they were too poor to buy one. -- i am talking about 20$ type-c earbuds vs 16" macbook size marshall speaker. -- as a result, i did not give my headphones and they continued to play music.

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dartharva an hour ago | parent | prev [-]

> Did you walk over? Did you say hi? Did you lower yourself to be around their height? Give them a second or two to get used to you?

I personally detest the kind of people who behave like this. It all just exudes deliberate fakeness; if anyone were to try this on me I'll only be irritated more than anything else.