You do live in a different, underprivileged world. Many Google engineers have never not heard back from a job app.

I will never understand people who refuse to work at a big company yet complain about money of all things. For reference my last job at Google paid $450k+. It seems like it would behoove you to enter the other world.

And half of that is taxed. The rest is spent on over-priced housing. And now you have no time/energy left to build anything of value. Congratulations.

If you want a serious answer:

Most software engineers are not status-seekers, and are not driven by prestige or a big paycheck.

Big tech companies attract the same type of software developers that investment banks do to finance majors, or MBB management consulting firms do to business majors.

Of course, I'm not saying that those are the people that FAANG-companies get exclusively, far from, but you have to...immerse yourself, and drink some kool aid, before you enter that rat race.

Most people will look at leetcode marathons, infinite interview rounds, relocation, etc. and think "absolutely not".

Of course some people are just really sharp, and can almost stumble into these jobs, but most will have to put some real effort into it, and jump through the flaming hoops.