Just throw it out of the window. I'm not going to give my 6y son access to a smart phone until he is much older, ideally when he is in senior high school. The only issue is that his future friends may not have the same idea, so it's going to be extremely difficult when he grows older. Fortunately we have a mobile ban in the school, so at least they know this is not a good thing.

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Forgeties79 3 days ago | parent | next [-]

The problem with this approach is their peers. Prohibition culture does not work if it’s so easy to access it elsewhere. My parents learned this when they tried to restrict video games strictly to the weekends when I was a kid haha!

I find having conversations with parents at school and the parents of their friends leads to the best results (so far, I’ve only been at it a few years for my kiddos so we’ll see I guess longterm). If you’re all vaguely on the same page it just seems to make things a little easier. If that’s not an option, then just don’t be the first person to buy one and when all their peers start having certain technology you give them access too, but you sit down and talk to them about it or find ways to restrict the faucet.

For instance, when it became clear YouTube was not going to be completely eradicated from my house, I just ripped a few videos and added them to my Plex server. They get to watch a little bit of nonsense content, but they’re not just getting flooded with more of it constantly (or ads). As a result those YT videos are just one among several things they watch. It isn’t special or all consuming.

Video games have also been interesting. Most of the parents I know have, like me, adopted to use older stuff and/or just not let them get on the Internet.

Ultimately at some point you have to do some combination of “controlling the faucet,” watching what your kids are watching so you know what’s going on, and ultimately educating them/giving them context to the media they are enjoying.

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markus_zhang 3 days ago | parent [-]

Yeah we are doing that now. But I don’t know what to do if all his peers are on social media. I already know some of his friends have extensive screen time — their parents don’t care.

	▲	Forgeties79 2 days ago \| parent [-]
		I just try to keep up and provide a space for them to talk about what they see and here. We’ll see if it works lol

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seanmcdirmid 3 days ago | parent | prev [-]

> The only issue is that his future friends may not have the same idea, so it's going to be extremely difficult when he grows older.

Third grade and it’s already happening: My kid has already had trouble in his social circle at school because we made him cut back his Roblox time by a lot. It’s not even that anyone plays at school, but supposedly almost all the boys (and many girls) are playing after school.

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markus_zhang 3 days ago | parent [-]

What do you plan to do? Mine is in preschool but it's just a few years away...I feel pretty desperate.

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SoftTalker 3 days ago | parent | next [-]

Find some other activities. Tee-ball, soccer, swimming, cub scouts, anything that involves interacting with other kids without technology.

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seanmcdirmid 3 days ago | parent | next [-]

My son has a friend that went the sports route. He is always trying to sneak Roblox screen time when he is over on a play date and when my kid goes over to his house, his parents are very strict about no screen time and they have a great time.

It’s still up to the parent to enforce limitations even if you can distract them with other things.

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SoftTalker 3 days ago | parent [-]

Agreed, but at least they have those hours outside doing something physical.

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seanmcdirmid 2 days ago | parent [-]

He’s also very good at sports. My kid not so much but we have him in a couple of things.

	▲	SoftTalker 2 days ago \| parent [-]
		Doesn't matter as long as he's having fun.

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markus_zhang 3 days ago | parent | prev [-]

Yeah we are doing that. And I added camping and hiking into the game. The problem is, we need to find other parents that share the same mind, but I’m too shy to reach out:/

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iteria 3 days ago | parent | prev [-]

Just ban it. My kid is in that age group and roblox is banned. Her feelings on the matter are irrelevant. I don't know why people hand wring about "oh they'll be left out". Oh well? I'm a millennial. I remember being just a poor kid at a school with kkds much wealthier than me. There were a lot of things my friends had that I didn't. Like a cellphone. I wasn't in the group chats and somehow I still survived.

My kid is disappointed, but it's fine. She has friends play the games she does have and she has a lot of other games. She had a lot of other ways to socialize with them. I honestly don't see roblox as different than any other social fad. Roblox is just the default digital hangout spot for kids, but it doesn't have to be for your kid's friend circle.

	▲	Forgeties79 2 days ago \| parent [-]
		My guess is your kid is a little older than mine. Do you find she has actually adhered to the ban? Or do you think she plays it with her friends when you’re not around (such as at their homes)?