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everdrive 18 hours ago

Hopefully society continues to develop healthy norms with regard to this sort of technology. Collectively it's taken us a while, but I think people generally are starting to get the picture. Smartphones are bad in a wide variety of ways, but even when people miss some of the nuance I think we can make progress regarding the minimization of their usage.

amelius 17 hours ago | parent | next [-]

Some people will slap a label like "liberal" on "using my smartphone whenever the hell I want". And then people will think that's how it should be.

rootusrootus 16 hours ago | parent | next [-]

An electronic version of coal rolling. "You can't tell me this is unhealthy, and I'm going to prove it!"

StarGrit 9 hours ago | parent [-]

People "roll coal" it because it is kinda amusing to do it, and it is a middle finger towards people they perceive to be preachy.

I accidentally "rolled coal" in my 90s Landrover because I was in totally the wrong gear going up a steep hill. It was amusing in the way of "oh shit! I kinda just blew a load of black smoke in the driver face behind me".

Obviously, I don't do this deliberately.

Braxton1980 16 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

Sounds more like "freedom" which New York has taken away with some big government regulations.

/S

thinkingtoilet 18 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-]

Here in MA there is a 'bell to bell' phone ban bill in the works. I'm very happy we're letting kids be kids again. There is no need for a phone during the school day.

1659447091 12 hours ago | parent | next [-]

And just to show how (US) universal this idea is becoming, a Texas law banning cellphones went into effect at the start of the school year.

This happened at the same time a law requiring the Ten Commandments to be displayed in public school classrooms would have went into effect but was temporarily blocked while it works it's way through the courts [0]

[Texas educators praise new school cellphone ban] https://www.texastribune.org/2025/09/10/texas-cell-phone-ban...

[0] https://apnews.com/article/ten-commandments-bill-texas-schoo...

1718627440 11 hours ago | parent [-]

> how (US) universal

I praise you for not defaulting to US-defaultism, which is quite common on HN, but this really seems to be universal. There are also regulations like this in Scandinavia, France, Germany is talking about it.

eitally 12 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-]

California just got strict about this, too. I have found a dramatic increase in the amount of interpersonal talking that's happening in school as a result, which is great!

SchemaLoad 10 hours ago | parent [-]

Australia banned phones in schools 1-2 years ago and it's been widely recognised as a huge success. I think banning social media like facebook/tiktok/etc for kids would be a huge benefit as well. Leaving just IM/group chats for kids to directly talk to each other without scrolling a feed of ragebait and ai slop.

0_____0 16 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-]

I'm expecting a kiddo this winter and my use of devices+my likely future kid's relationship with tech has really been on my mind. The fact that people are thinking through this and actually working on it puts me slightly more at ease.

eitally 12 hours ago | parent [-]

You probably won't have much to worry about until you have to decide whether screen time for your kid (at age 3-4) is a reasonable trade-off for you and your partner to have peaceful time to yourselves. Then it'll rear it's head again, after lulling you into complacency, when the kid is middle school age and all their friends have smartphones. Then you have to decide whether the convenience factor (for you) of your kid having a device is worth the trade-off of... them having a device.

Fwiw, my older two are 14 & 16 and we still use device control software on their phones and laptops. The younger of the two complains a bit periodically but the older one just accepts that it's the way it is and gets on with his life [most of the time].

I personally advise you not to let your young kid get into e-gaming. Things like Fortnite, Roblox and Minecraft are gateways to increased device usage, and the benefits are (again, imho) not remotely worth it nor irreplaceable by much healthier alternatives.

Fun tidbit: my 8yo has a Kindle Fire and we've let her have Netflix & Disney+ installed on it. She also uses the Kindle & Libby apps to read voraciously, and Khan Academy for math. When she watches streaming media, though, she frequently watches it on mute with subtitles. That shocked me to see, and I asked her about it. She's 100% cool with that and appreciate the "privacy" of being able to watch things without other people meddling in her business. Shrug.

SchemaLoad 10 hours ago | parent | next [-]

Banning a 16 year old from minecraft is so far beyond reasonable imo. I'd agree with not giving young kids ipads and walking away. But what sounds like a blanket ban on gaming is absurd.

kelnos 5 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-]

Serious question (I don't have kids of my own): before smartphones and tablets and the ubiquity of laptops and computers, what did parents do to get some peaceful time to themselves?

It's hard to believe that parents were only able to achieve this during the past 15-20 years.

(When I was a kid in the 80s and 90s, I spent plenty of time outdoors with my friends in the neighborhood, and also inside, in front of my Nintendo, either with friends or without. Not sure how much peace my parents got, but I assume it was non-zero.)

tpxl 21 minutes ago | parent | next [-]

Same thing they do now: Get a nanny, ask the grandparents, playdates, ... Putting kids in front of a device is lazy, and unfortunately, most of us are lazy.

SchemaLoad 4 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

What era are you talking about? Later than the 90s had computers and game consoles. Before that it was going outside and digging holes, throwing stones.

Yeul 12 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

Parents have always wanted time for themselves. There are Americans alive today who will tell you that they used to play outside from dusk to dawn and only saw their parents at dinner.

supportengineer 9 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

>> There is no need for a phone during the school day

I see you don't have kids yourself. You need to sync up with them when after-school plans change.

kelnos 5 hours ago | parent [-]

We got by just fine during the school day for decades (centuries?) before smartphones existed, and we can continue to do so without them.

tstrimple 35 minutes ago | parent | next [-]

Inane appeals to tradition are boring as fuck and completely useless. We should continue to circumcise infant males because we did it for decades (centuries?) and got by just fine! This says nothing about whether kids having access to cellphones is worthwhile and everything about how garbage your argument against them is.

LtWorf 2 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

Everybody else has a phone so the expectation is that they can do change of plans and you're supposed to know where your kid is.

causal 18 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

Hopefully as a society we can also learn the lesson that tech companies cannot be trusted to deliver what's best for us.

chronciger 17 hours ago | parent | next [-]

> Hopefully as a society we can also learn the lesson that tech companies cannot be trusted to deliver what's best for us.

If society were ignorant, then it’s forgivable. But society is not ignorant.

We know tech companies deliver things bad for us (lies and manipulation).

And we knowingly choose it, over the good (truth).

9rx 17 hours ago | parent | prev | next [-]

Why would anyone expect them to deliver what is best for us when the purpose of a company is to deliver what others want?

array_key_first 13 hours ago | parent [-]

Because social media sites like Facebook literally said they're going to make the world better, by connecting more people and empowering more ideas.

It was all bullshit of course, but people did believe it, myself included. Just 15 years ago the outlook of social media was much more optimistic.

supportengineer 9 hours ago | parent | next [-]

They could have gone down the path of being a service with a monthly subscription. Instead of making the customer become the product.

Imagine an alternate universe where, since you were paying them, they kept you safe and secure online, and kept the bad actors away.

9rx 8 hours ago | parent | next [-]

The only offering that possibly might have been compelling enough to charge for was Messenger if it existed in a vacuum, but there were already numerous services offering much the same for free (e.g. MSN, ICQ, AIM), and when others realized that is what the people actually wanted, many more immediately threw their hat in the ring (e.g. iMessage). There would have been no practical hope of it making it as a paid service.

crummy 9 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

assuming they were able to acquire customers and dominate the world with that business model, would that have prevented them from doing algorithmic feeds and promoting clickbait and poisoning politics and the rest?

sure, people would have been able to cancel their monthly facebook subscriptions if they didn't like that stuff. but we can effectively do that now just by not using it.

9rx 12 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

> Just 15 years ago the outlook of social media was much more optimistic.

Those who forget Usenet are doomed to repeat it, I suppose.

> It was all bullshit of course

Or, more likely, what was dreamed of ended up being incorrect. Like we learn every time we try social media, people don't actually want to be social online. That takes work and the vast majority of people don't want to spend their free time doing work. They want to sit back, relax, and be entertained by the professionals.

As before, businesses can only survive if they give others exactly what they want, which doesn't necessarily overlap with what is good for them. A fast food burger isn't good for you, but it is a good business to be in because it is something many people want. Arguably small communities like HN with exceptionally motivated people can make it work to some extent, but that is not something that captures the masses.

It's not coincidence that those who tried to make a go of social media ~15 years ago have all turned into what are little more than TV channels with a small mix of newspaper instead. That is where the want is actually found at the moment. Social media didn't work in the 1980s, the 2010s, and it won't work in the 2080s either. It's is not something that appeals to humans (generally speaking).

RyanHamilton 11 hours ago | parent [-]

Can you provide an example of where facebook tried to do what most people would consider good that also required any >1% kind of sacrifice or risk on their part? My impression is their moto was win at any cost and ask forgiveness later (not because we mean that either but because it will reduce the legal penalties and make us look like normal humans.) In some ways watching Mark reminds me of the infamous cigarette cartel testifying.

9rx 8 hours ago | parent [-]

> Can you provide an example of where facebook tried to do what most people would consider good

They gave the social media thing an honest try for a short period of time. And it even came with a lot of fanfare initially as people used it as the "internet's telephone book" to catch up with those they lost touch with.

But once initial pleasantries were exchanged, people soon realized why they lost touch in the first place, and most everyone started to see that continually posting pictures of their cat is a stupid use of time. And so, Facebook and the like recognized that nobody truly wanted social media, gave up on the idea, and quickly pivoted into something else entirely.

Social media is a great idea in some kind of theoretical way — I can see why you bought into the idea — but you can't run a business on great theoretical ideas. You can't even run a distributed public service without profit motive on great theoretical ideas, as demonstrated by Usenet. You have to actually serve what people actually want, which isn't necessarily (perhaps not even often) what is good for them.

rc5150 15 hours ago | parent | prev [-]

This is the same logic that has parents buying games like GTA for their prepubescent children and being dumbfounded that the kids are exposed to violent images.

While we can definitely point the blame at tech companies that manipulate algorithms, engage in dark patterns, etc, it's ultimately up to the consumer to consume judiciously and moderate their own well being. Nobody ever asked Apple or Google to "deliver what's best" for society. What's best for society is a collection of rational, intelligent, and accountable adults.

mrguyorama 14 hours ago | parent [-]

America has an entire political party who runs a party line that unregulated businesses will naturally do what's "best" because of "free market mumble mumble". They even sometimes outright insist that "best" in that context means "best for humans and society", and that any attempt to constrain that will be Communism and cause all of society to collapse.

>What's best for society is a collection of rational, intelligent, and accountable adults.

That same party insists that you should be able to choose to enroll your child in a school that does nothing but teach weird christian doctrines, and outright lies like "Evolution is controversial" or "Continental drift is not proven" or "The USA is a Christian country". They demonstrably want to be able to direct my tax dollars to these institutions, based on their choice.

Everyone should spend time checking out what the tens of millions of self reported fundamentalist "Christian" americans pay money for. There is an entire alternative media economy and it is horrifying. It exists to reinforce tons of outright false and delusional narratives, like an imagined persecution complex against christians.

If you think those tens of millions of Americans don't have power or sway in this country, they are literally the reason why visa and mastercard keep shutting down porn businesses (the higher fraud claim is just false and probably a lie, ask me how I know!) and the current House majority leader is their guy, as well as Trump's previous VP, as well as maybe technically JD Vance, as well as like Joe Rogan, who insists that AI is the second coming of christ because it doesn't have a mother, just like christ. Not joking, that is a real thing that Joe Rogan has made millions of dollars saying to over 20 million people. Oh, and at least one Supreme Court Justice.

justinclift 9 hours ago | parent [-]

> the higher fraud claim is just false and probably a lie, ask me how I know!

How do you know? :)