> If you imagine neurotypical and autistic as two "languages"

This analogy is very analogous. Damian Milton introduced it to academia as the "double empathy problem", and there are a trickle of studies confirming the obvious corollaries of the analogy (e.g. doi:10.1177/1362361320919286 "Autistic peer-to-peer information transfer is highly effective") which are considered surprising by academia because autism (like most psychological conditions) is defined badly:

> Autism is defined clinically by deficits in social communication. It may therefore be expected that autistic people find it difficult to share information with other people.