Moderate consumption of coffee is fine. I'm not aware of any severe damage from drinking a cup a day. I don't think the comparison with alcohol is apt.

Not for everybody on the spectrum. I certainly see the difference if I go a week with coffee and no coffee -- the weardown and overwhelming effects slowly accumulate with coffee.

If the author feels overwhelmed, I'd say coffee should be tried first. It's not easy (caffeine addiction is real, especially for the spectrum), but it gets easier and easier with time.