Making demands about how you want to be contacted when the group has been trying to include you for years is a dick move at minimum. You can say sorry I'll call you back in 10 if you are busy.

Trying to dress this up as adhd/age/head of household (what is that even??) is just expecting the world to revolve around you

No, learn to be a decent person.

Or the person's just going through a rough patch.

I feel bad because in a few years that person might get laid off and realize they don't have any friends anymore.