Remix.run Logo
drivebyhooting 2 days ago

You don’t know your neighbor’s circumstances. Maybe he biologically doesn’t need as much sleep. Or maybe his wife does a lot more child care. Or maybe he is okay with the children watching iPad while he exercises.

xyzelement 2 days ago | parent | next [-]

(I am the person you are responding to so I can be uncharitable towards myself)

All the things you said are an excuse. All that happens if I believe the excuses is that I will be fatter and fatter, no thanks.

I 100% know that I "could" run every day if I got my shit together, if I was really dying to do it, and if it was part of my identity. The fact that it's not part of my identity is the whole problem.

Say it another way - if my neighbor and I switched families and bodies, he'd still run - in my situation - while I'd still succumb to the excuses - in his situation.

kaffekaka 2 days ago | parent | prev [-]

You have a good point, and I do agree.

But at the same time I have been both a person exercising every day and a person not understanding how to find the time for exercise (even after having been the exercising person!). It is remarkable how much our identity can be shaped by contingent circumstances or beliefs.

So how to know if one is someone who needs alot of sleep, or someone who just believes there is no time? I actually don't know.

xyzelement 2 days ago | parent [-]

Identity shapes our commitment. For example, when I was a single guy living in NYC, I'd do sometimes 2 hours of yoga every day because the studio was on my walk home and if I had nothing to do, I'd just go there. So it required relatively little commitment.

So I identified as a "yogi" but it didn't take much sacrifice to do it.

As a suburban dad of 3, working out requires greater commitment than it did before, and I am failing to muster the required level of commitment to overcome that friction sometimes. While my neighbor is more committed because I guess it's part of his identity.

drivebyhooting 2 days ago | parent [-]

You say committed. I hear sacrifice. What will you sacrifice to do yoga for 2 hours? Most likely the children or wife’s wellbeing.

I used to climb V10. I can’t train like that anymore unless I’m willing to sacrifice something else for it.

xyzelement 2 days ago | parent [-]

Here's the reality. If I REALLY wanted to make 2 hours for exercise a day, I could: 1. Eliminate all digital distraction, which I am sure adds up to more than an hour every day. 2. Specifically, if I turned off my phone in the evening, I could go to bed at least an hour earlier and thus wake up an hour earlier to work out. 3. I could negotiate an arrangement with my wife that creates an hour for me - I haven't even tried. 4. I could look into hiring a babysitter for an hour a day.

Each of those things is "a sacrifice" of something but on a conscious level I am happy to sacrifice digital distraction or the cost of a babysitter for an hour. The fact that I haven't jumped to do this (but my neighbor, perhaps, has) is what I am talking about.