I think it's the bandwidth, or lack there of.

A lot of it happens in out of band posts like these.

It seems to happen less in interactive (i.e. chat, etc.). Make no mistake, it absolutely happens there.

But not as much as in async posts (I don't think).

I don't think it happens much at all with video.

Most of it is surrounded by context (or lack of). How difficult it is to communicate (typing like this is not easy, and certainly not for the impatient).

I have to keep telling folks when they get that Look in their face because of what someone said or didn't say over email or an instant message to not judge on that. If it's that important to you, CALL them. TALK to them, you simply can not rely on typed conversations for anything that impacts you emotionally.

"What do you think they meant by that?" Oh no.

It's just an awful medium.

That sort of is what I find.

I know that my idea is completely rectally-sourced, but I feel that the less time that we have to think about an element of an interaction, the less likely we are to go into the nasty "flame mode" we see.

But there's exceptions to every case (especially when human nature is involved). I actually know people that are so emotionally broken, that every interaction that they have; regardless of the context and medium, is a fight.

They tend to be lonely and angry. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.