you might end up with the best filesystem in the world that no-one will use. you sacrificed long term sustainability for short term win.

even if It would be shipped in similar way to zfs, noone will use it for anything more important than homelab

why? with this altitude you cannot be threated serious and this imply many risks what you might came up with in the future. another risk is they you are sole developer of this filesystem, that's also not acceptable to consider use if bcachefs seriously.

my advice would be: consider expanding team to have few developers that are able to contribute. learn to control your pride for the good of the while project. working with (and coordinating) other developers could make you understand better upstream kernel community. and given that chance you could delegate someone else with better diplomatic skills to deal with upstream in way that would be more beneficial for the whole project in long term.