I want to glide at roughly constant speed for some distance. Some mild breaking is fine. I cant glide if I let off the accelerator, then I come to a fairly firm stop.

I want my right foot on the break pedal, ready to brake hard and fast in the rare case that something comes across the road.

I don't want to reduce speed any further than is necessary to have a safe breaking distance at fully ready state.

With any other car (that I have driven) than the Tesla, I can approach a situation like this at between 20kmh and 40kmh, depending on the specifics. In the Tesla I need to go at between 5 and 10kmh.

Ah OK, I see what you mean. Yeah, on my car, that's a setting I can toggle.