> that turn into self-inhibiting labels that restrict personal development

Say more. Why do you see these labels as inhibitory rather than liberatory?

I have a complicated relationship with the label given a lack of a formal diagnosis and many years of accusations of ASD, and I haven't identified any positive side of a diagnosis and will likely never pursue one. But this doesn't mean the label hasn't helped me connect with others in my life with ASD, some very hand-wavy, and some non-verbal adults who must have live assisted. Do i actually have it? Does it even matter either way?

I think labels are fine but making it the most significant part of your identity is where it can be self-inhibiting. If you feel engaged in life and not limited, you are doing just fine.

A lot of people are really desperate to be in groups. Humans do this naturally.

A lot of labels put people in boxes or limiting groups. This changes how they think about themselves. Instead of discovering new things people will reject/ignore new things that don't reinforce their labels/boxes.

The one constant in life is change. Putting yourself in self-imposed labels/boxes stifles ones ability to properly interpret change. Their viewpoints change to fit their labels.

Nobody is saying labels are bad. But letting labels define you? Thats often the issue.

Social media has made this problem much, much worse.

I think a great example is teenagers who are looking for their clique. We all look back on ourselves and laugh at how desperate we were to fit in and the silly things we did/wore/etc. Adults do the same thing but with much more severe consequences and the reflection often never happens.