I hated small talk traditionally. It was very much a learned trait. One of the best conversation openers is “what keeps you busy?” and then ask open ended questions.

Ask about their favorite travel destinations or even what are some interesting things about where they live.

On the other hand, step outside your comfort zone and try something different so you have something to talk about interesting.

https://tynan.com/letstalk/

You didn’t become a software developer overnight. You won’t become a great conversationalist over night either.

“How to Talk to Anyone”

https://www.amazon.com/How-Talk-Anyone-Success-Relationships...

(not an affiliate link)

People can certainly decide that certain activities aren't their thing.

I don't want to push to give presentations at international events is certainly a valid decision for any of a number of reasons.

So is preferring to spend more time on coding than managing/mentoring/etc.

But it all has consequences and some branches will lead to more promotions/money/etc. than others. And you may be perfectly fine with that. But go into with eyes wide open.