It's just as dumb though because the act of processing doesn't really mean anything.

If it didn't mean anything then why the findings in the article?

It absolutely does if you're able to take off the pedantry glasses for like 5 seconds. Why are you nitpicking this? is it because you actually think articles like this are about chopping carrots?

"if it couldn't be made outside of a factory, don't eat it."

from someone else in the comments is pretty clear

Here we go again...