I wish I could take the Rust pill like everyone else and be happy.

I am not a stranger to the programming world. I am fluent in Python, Java, Scala, Erlang. I can write acceptable Haskell and C++ and Common Lisp. I am well versed in functional programming (though I don’t hate OOP — it is still a good thing when done correctly, and I am a big fan of Smalltalk).

However, for some reason, I am completely unproductive in Rust. It always fights me. There’s always something I want to do (graph structures? spliced lists?), and it’s always “you don’t need that” and “it’s not the Rust way”. There’s always explicit lifetimes and you miss something and you need to rewrite huge swaths of your code. And nothing is refactorable. It’s not even a good functional language, there are no persistent data structures, and it’s a pain to make them, and no ways to express yourself functionally like I used to do with Scala.

But apparently, everyone and their dog like Rust and are insanely productive in it. What am I missing?

I do miss several of the things you list, too, especially (safe) self-referential data structures. But Rust is a fantastic compromise solution if your number one priority is to match the performance (or rather, performance possibilities) of C and C++, and have memory safety while doing it. If your number one goal is to be able to write memory safe ideomatic code that is entirely comparable to those languages, and then add some functional programming and lots of quality of life stuff to that, then it's pretty sweet.

In other words: Don't think of it as rivalling the entry cost of Python or Java, or the expressiveness of Haskell or Scala. Try to think of it as a replacement for C++, with memory safety and piles of quality of life improvements. And then with a sprinkle of the other things on top.