People defending themselves from bigotry, and bigots themselves, are not equivalent. Black people not wanting racists to exist, and racists not wanting black people to exist, do you see a distinction?

There has been such a consistent attempt at ramming square pegs into round holes online in trying to “both sides” a bunch of these issues.

One trait is immutable and the other is not.

One trait is entirely internally focused and is not defined by a rejection of anyone external to the subject, the other's trait is entirely defined by such an external focus on the rejection of another person's immutable identity.

You guess racist? I had a different first guess. Then I had a better second guess. I then had a three and fourth guess. Then I wasn't sure at all. None of them were racism. This becomes a personality test that speaks about who you are and what battles you always see.